Then we get so busy judging ourselves, that we forget the good things we did, and spend a LOT of energy feeling guilty and mulling over past errors and mistakes.

Now, imagine a friend explaining to you that their morale is very low, they made a stupid mistake, and they keep thinking about it... Because you're their friend, most of you will have one urge, and one urge only: console them, make them feel better. Maybe you would remind them of a different situation when they did really well? Maybe you would suggest that at the end of the day, the mistake they are so sorry about is not that big, and they could forgive themselves? You might even suggest a different line of action for next time if ever a similar situation might show up. Then you'd tell them again you are their friend, no matter what. Does that sound plausible?

So now imagine that friend is... you. Would you tell yourself all these things?

The following exercise might help you there.

Before you go to bed, stand in front of the mirror, look at yourself into your eyes, the way you'd look a friend into their eyes so they'd know you really think what you're telling them, they'd know you do love them. And tap (starting at the top of the head, all the way down) on each of these points. Let's say your name is Charlotte. Here you go.

  • Charlotte I am proud of you because...

    identify one thing you did well over the day, even a really tiny thing, like brushing your teeth. And if no reason comes to your mind, no bother, just say «Charlotte I am proud of you» and get to the next point.

  • Charlotte I forgive you for...

    usually, particularly the first times, it is much easier to scold yourself that congratulate yourself. So let's use it! Flip the reproach over, make it a forgiveness opportunity! And then, if there is nothing you did wrong, even better! Just go with «Charlotte I forgive you» and get to the next point. Your subconscious mind will find some piece of hidden guilt and apply the forgiveness to it.

  • Charlotte I choose to...

    now is the time to look towards the future and offer an action plan for the next day ro the more distant future. If you have no suggestion, just go for generic topics, such as «Charlotte I choose happiness» (or health, or anything that makes your heart sing!), then get to the next point, keeping the same choice or any other feel-good one.

  • And the icing on the cake : Charlotte I love you!

    On the first time, most people experience an emotional response to this, maybe tears or maybe laughter, or shivers or whatever. We are not exactly trained to declare our love to ourselves, are we? But Paul Scheele will insist: « Hold that gaze! »

I initially heard of this exercise in an interview between Paul Scheele and Jack Canfield. Of course, I spiced it up with EFT to get more benefit from it!

Try this for a week or two, or even better, for 30 days or more. Your biggest risk is to get to sleep with a smile on your lips!

Did this help?  Share your experience below or feel free to contact me for any questions. Thank you.